Anonymous asked: Will you update soon ? :3 I miss you.. :(
I did write a bit more of my Hoya story but hopefully soon >_< Once finals are over I’ll have a shit ton more time, I swear!
Anonymous asked: Will you update soon ? :3 I miss you.. :(
I did write a bit more of my Hoya story but hopefully soon >_< Once finals are over I’ll have a shit ton more time, I swear!
So… I started my freshman year of college about a month ago and to be honest I was really fucking overwhelmed.
I thought it would be easy making friends and getting situated into dorm life. I was super wrong. The first week or so, I was homesick and feeling kinda lonely…
It’s definitely been getting better though. My classes are all okay. I’ve made friends through clubs, people on my floor, group projects, etc.
I think I’m taking too many credits though because I honestly feel like I have no down time.
Either way, I hope once I really settle down, I’ll be able to write more.
I get an email any time someone sends me an ask, so feel free to ask me about anything college related if you’d like! I know, talking to some other tumblr friends, that people mainly all go through the same thing.
Update soon ^_^
Anonymous asked: Will you write again soon ? :3
Yeah, I’m sorry! Its been a month or so into my freshman year of college… I really haven’t found time to write T_T I probably could if I made time, but my studies and social life come first. Though I have brainstormed a bunch of ideas for future scenarios.
I’ll try my best to get something out soon >_<
esp. for Sunggyu, Sungjong and Dongwoo
You giggled. You couldn’t help it. You just had to giggle. He looked like such a nerd. You covered your mouth to stop the fit of giggles from escaping. It shouldn’t be this funny but it was. Hoya just looked so… so… out of it. Or bored. You weren’t sure. But it was the way he was staring blankly at the camera with the most serious look on his face. Since when doesn’t Hoya smile? He looked much better smiling, you decided.
“Hoya, you look constipated.” You pointed at his 10th grade yearbook picture and blurted.
“Excuse me? Who looks constipated in their yearbook photo? At least I don’t look like a geek.” Hoya shoved you away from his yearbook. You laughed, you actually thought you looked pretty good in your yearbook photo. Perhaps a bit too eager, but it was definitely part of the better half of the school photos.
“Hoya-oppa, you know you still didn’t sign my yearbook yet.” You pointed to the blank page.
“I can sign yours whenever I want to! I could even sneak into your room at night to sign it if I wanted,” He declared.
“Wow. You’re such a creep.” You shoved him away from you in mock-disgust.
“I’m just trying to say that’s how easy it is for me to sign it. Don’t rush me, kay? I’ll write something when I’m good and ready.” Hoya looked away from you, hiding the fact he wasn’t actually sure what to write.
You stretched your toes down towards the water, pouting when you couldn’t reach it. Just last year, they had built a dock over the place you and Hoya typically sat. Stubborn, Hoya didn’t want to move places. This place was the two of yours, he had told you. A public dock wasn’t going to change that. And so the two of you were, sitting on top of a wooden dock in the middle of the night when no one else was there. You were quite certain that each time you sat down, you got a new splinter in your butt. You preferred the sand between your toes and oceans waves playfully lapping at your feet. You snapped out of your thoughts when Hoya clicked off the flashlight, leaving the two of you in the darker glow of a not-yet-full moon.
“Yah, what’d you do that for?” You asked.
“Hm? I don’t know, I was just thinking.” Something was different. Maybe it was how out of it Hoya sounded. You thought back to the last few weeks, realizing he’s been like that for a while now.
“You?” He interrupted your thoughts again.
“Hm? I don’t know, same thing.” You replied, mimicking his answer.
“Well, what were you thinking about then?” He asked. He turned his face towards you. Half of it was covered in darkness, but the moonlight lit his face just right that you could see the glint in his eyes.
“Oh?” A smirk spread across his face and you wanted to face palm. What an ego. You punched his arm.
“About how you’ve been kinda weird lately,” you finished your original thought.
“Oh.” This time his voice was flat, “have I really been weird lately?” You thought about this for a moment, watching your feet dangle next to Hoya’s. You hadn’t expected him to take your observation seriously. So something was bothering him and you felt guilty you hadn’t noticed earlier.
“I guess you’ve been acting out of it lately. Lost in thought. Maybe not as happy?” You suggested. You looked over at Hoya, in search of an answer in his expression, if not words. You saw him stare intently down at the water.
“My dad and I have been fighting.” He said bluntly. Before you could even question him further, he blurted, “I want to drop out of school.”
Long deafening silence.
You knew Hoya had always gotten good grades. He was pretty popular at school, not at the top, but had a lot of friends. His family life, to your knowledge, had always been pleasant too. As the middle child, not too much weight was put on him, but not too little either. What was wrong? You had always gone through school almost enjoying it. Maybe not the tests or the work, but you had friends and even some of the teachers were cool. You couldn’t think of a reason why anyone would hate it so much they’d want to leave. The next thought to enter your head was in fear. What would happen to Hoya’s future? All the adults would tell you day and night how important school and education were for your future. What about Hoya’s future?
“W-well what about switching schools? They can’t all be that bad?” You suggested.
“What? No, I think you misunderstood. I don’t hate our school. I just…” he searched for the right word, “need something different. That’s all. I want to do something else.”
“Are you… disappointed in me?” Something that sounded like sadness with a hint of anger resonated in his voice.
“What do you want to do?” You thought back to the last 16 years of your existence and all the times you’ve been with Hoya.
“Dance? Maybe perform? I’m good at that right? You’ve seen me dance before right?” Hoya nudged you. The twinkle was back in his eyes as he looked at your hopefully.
“Y-yeah. I mean, you never stop moving really. To be honest, you never showed me a whole dance. It’s always been a move here, a move there.” You admitted.
The silence was suffocating. Hoya looked across the ocean blankly. Maybe you should have just said he was a good dancer. But that would be lying, considering you’d never really seen a dance from him.
He grabbed your hand and pulled you up, “Come on. We’re going.”
“You’re gonna watch me dance.” With that, he pulled you off the dock and onto the street. You tried to keep up with his pace as he jogged ahead of you. The night air was cool against your skin, yet you could see the beads of sweat beginning to form on the back of Hoya’s neck. His veins stood out against his skin as he clutched at the two yearbooks, saving you from the load. You were glad that your families were close enough to let the two of you wander off alone like this at night. They trusted he would take care of you.
Your thoughts were interrupted by Hoya coming to a sudden stop. You looked up ahead of you and saw the old abandoned gym next to school. Its paint was fading, graffiti lined the sides, and at least one window was cracked. Still, Hoya cracked open the door and ushered you inside. He led you through the empty gymnasium and into a back hallway. You followed, listening to the sound of your echoing footsteps. The hall looked like a normal school hallway. Classroom doors lined the sides.
“I don’t know why they abandoned this place.” Hoya muttered, “It’s got classrooms that I’m guessing were used for detention or health classes, yoga studios, and of course, dance studios. Our new gym doesn’t have any of that. What a stupid trade in.”
He finally stopped in front of a door and pushed it open. Mirrors lined two sides of the room. The rest of the walls were a fading black—almost grey. A small metal stand stood in the corner. The only polished-looking thing in the room was a small stereo placed on top of the metal stand.
“Sit there.” He pointed to the middle of the largest mirrored wall. You took the two yearbooks from him and sat down with your back against the mirror. Hoya clicked on the stereo and stood facing you. His fingers reached up and unzipped his hoodie. He shrugged it off his shoulders and threw it into the corner. He was only wearing a white tank under—since when had your neighbor gotten, well, attractive? Your thoughts on his looks quickly disappeared as the music began and Hoya started to dance. His arms, legs, body, all seemed to work perfectly in sync with each other. As if living and breathing the music, Hoya’s motions reflected just what you heard. At the perfect moments, he was fluid and graceful. At the perfect moments, he was robotic and intense. Each motion was filled with so much passion, you truly believed you were witnessing passion come to life. This was what he was made to do.
When the music ended, Hoya stood silently in the same spot. You watched as his chest heaved up and down. Sweat clung to his body and his breath came out fast and even. He didn’t say anything, he just stood there, waiting.
You repeated the last thing on your mind, “I-I understand why you want to dance—it’s just what you were made to do.”
With that, Hoya smiled, “So you”ll support me?”
“Even if you left school for no reason, I’d support you.”
“I would’ve been disappointed. But seeing you dance… I know you’ll go far.” You looked up at him sincerely.
“Promise you’ll never let me quit or give up.” Hoya said it with such intensity.
“If I drop out of school and only pursue dance, i-it’ll be hard. I know it will be. Who knows how long it’ll take, how many hours of practice, how many auditions and teachers I have to go through before I make it big. Promise me, when I seem like I want to give up, you won’t let me?” He pleaded, now kneeling in front of you.
You reached out and grabbed his hands, “I promise. Forever.”
I’m still supporting T-ARA, what will happen after this, I do not know. I’m seriously going to miss Hwayoung and I really DO NOT want her to leave (like frig, I loved her rapping) . You guys probably think I’m “delusional” for still following them when they are “bullies” - I still have faith in the members you call “bitches” since while everyone was focusing on the negative, I was focusing on those moments (which outnumber the negative) where Hwayoung & the other members were really close with one another esp. Hyomin & Hwayoung. yes, I don’t care being called a delusional fan, I still support both sides.I really hope to see Hwayoung take a rest and comeback strong :) heck, even the fans and T-ARA need a rest after this.I’m using this picture a lot, but I think it’s really cute :)
I AGREE. GO YOU. WE SHOULD BE BEST FRIENDS T_T
What’s with all the T-ara hate? “Best if they just disband” “Only good thing to come out of this is they break up” “they’re sluts and whores” “they have no talent” I… am definitely more of a guy-group fan than girl-group fan but T-ara has constantly made catchy songs and all the members have worked their asses off for CCM. So long without vacations, and constantly promoting, practicing, while multitasking and acting in dramas, sitcoms, and reality shows.
Somehow… allkpop and other kpop news sites blow up with “T-ara members all bully Hwayoung through these texts that don’t really make sense” deal, and now everyone hates on them. I LOVE HWAYOUNG—she’s like possibly my 2nd favorite member behind Eunjung. I consider her a part of T-ara and I would be ridiculously disappointed if the other T-ara members did bully her.
What I can’t stand is… BEFORE this incident, I saw SO many people talking about how they didn’t like Hwayoung and how she didn’t add to the group because Eunjung and Hyomin could rap too. NOW however, everyone thinks the rest of T-ara’s trash and Hwayoung “carried” the rap and is “better than all the other members combined”.
Since the beginning I thought Hwayoung was a strong rapper… but people really need to stop changing sides so fast. No one knows whats really going on and CCM kinda sucks as an entertainment company… and T-ara still makes ridiculously catchy music and works their asses off.
No matter what happens, I know I’LL support what’s considered “T-ara” and all it’s members—past or present.
(Except I’m still ridiculously confused on the two new members… one who is 14… like wtf)
YEAH SO. THAT’S MY RANT. LEAVE T-ARA ALONE.
Crossing my fingers for tomorrow’s “huge announcement”.
Anyway… long update soon with Ch. 2 of Hoya’s story
OMG thats soo sweet TT^TT I totally love it. It´s perfection it´s self ♥ You´ve done a really great job!!! it´s amazing ^^
Aww thank you so much T_T I’m super glad you like it hehe. I… really don’t know what to say because its totallynotperfectbutimsuperflatteredandyeah. ♥
“Do you ever stop moving?”
“Do you ever stop nagging?”
You watched as Lee Howon, your neighbor, danced about by the beach side. He used a long twig as a makeshift microphone, twisting his way around it, moving this way and that. You turned your attention back to the water and threw another pebble in.
“When will your mom come back? I’m hungry!”
“Hoya-sshi, be patient!” You wiggled your five-year-old toes in the water as you threw in another pebble. Hoya rolled his eyes. He was stuck with you—his neighbor—once again. It was stupid how his family always hung around with yours. This time, his mom left him there alone thanks to his baby brother. Bored, he prodded you with his stick.
“Yah. Stop calling me Hoya. My name is Howon.” He muttered, glaring at you.
“I don’t like Howon. Hoya sounds much better.” You declared, sticking out your chin proudly. You actually started calling him Hoya when you were two, because you couldn’t pronounce Howon. Hoya was much easier when missing most of your teeth. Your little nickname for your neighbor stuck. Now your family and even sometimes his, called him Hoya.
“Hoya! Lunch is ready!” You heard your mother call from the grass.
“It’s Howon!” He mumbled quietly, before running towards the smell of food.
“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Hoya-sshi, Happy birthday to you!” You clapped as Hoya blew out the candles.
“My wish was that you’d stop calling me Hoya.” He folded his arms across his twelve year old chest definitively.
“You know, if you tell people your wish, then it won’t come true—Hoya-sshi.” You made sure to stress your name for him as if to prove a point.
“Fine. Then you don’t get any cake.” With that, he whirled around and left. You stood in the middle of his living room, surrounded by his family and yours, and yet you felt so alone. Usually you could handle the teasing and fighting that occurred between the two of you. But today you had worked hard helping your mom bake him that cake. You really wanted to show him you thought of him as a friend. You always felt dejected, and the fact it was his birthday made it worse. Without realizing it, you began to cry. Tears streamed down your face as you turned and ran out the door towards your home.
You sniffed and wiped away at the last tear as you heard your door creak open. You expected to see your own mother there to comfort you, but instead, Hoya’s mother stood in the doorway.
“You know, I think secretly he likes the name you gave him.” She said as she sat down next to you on your bed. She wrapped her arms around your small body to comfort you. You said nothing.
“He never corrects us about it at home, and now everyone, including little Hojun, calls him Hoya,” she added.
“Maybe thats why he hates me so much. Everyone calls him a name he hates now. It’s all my fault.” You sighed, for the first time feeling guilty.
“Go to beach, sweetie. He’s there now and I just talked to him. He’ll be nice, I promise.” She gave your arm a few pats and pushed you to your feet. You didn’t really want to. You really didn’t. But an adult just told you to go. So you should, right? You stared down at your feet and nodded, before taking off towards the shore. You knew where Hoya would be.
“Howon-sshi?” You asked timidly. His back was to you, cake by his feet, throwing rocks into the water. You made sure to call him by his given name. Hoya flinched as Howon left your lips. It just didn’t feel right coming from you, but he didn’t say anything.
“Um. I’m really sorry. I’ll start calling you Howon-sshi now.” You looked down at you hands and fidgeted. When you didn’t get a reply, you looked up to find Hoya waving you over towards him. He patted the ground next to him. Never in your eleven years had you been nervous around him, but for once you were. You sat down next to him but looked down at your toes in the water.
“My mom told me I made you cry.”
You nodded again.
The two of you sat in silence. The only sound was the ocean waves lapping at the shore. You kept yourself busy by grabbing at the sand with your toes and watching it slip away back onto the beach. Suddenly, out of nowhere, Hoya stretched and asked, “I’m older than you by almost a whole year right?” You nodded again, not sure what he was getting at.
“You should call me Hoya-oppa from now on okay?”
You looked at him in bewilderment. The sun was beginning to set, red hues painting the sky. The long rays of light hit the ground at the two of you sitting there, casting shadows this way and that. Hoya’s face was looking away in the distance and you just couldn’t quite make out his expression. Was he joking? This was a joke right?
“Huh?” Was all that you managed to babble out.
Hoya turned towards you, face suddenly serious, “I really didn’t mean to make you cry. I guess we’ve been friends since we were little—
“—we’re still little,” you pointed out, interrupting him.
“Shh. I’m talking. Anyway, we’ve been friends since we were little and so I feel like calling me Hoya-sshi is too distant, right? I’ll be your oppa and look out for you from now on okay? Now that I’m twelve, I can protect you!” He declared proudly, pointing to himself.
Again, a serious look passed over his face, “Also, if I’m going to protect you, then I shouldn’t be the one to make you cry… so I’m really sorry for that. All this time I guess I secretly liked the name Hoya.” He chuckled, “I actually flinch now when people call me Howon.” He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly now that his speech was over and he had admitted to liking the nickname you had chosen for him.
When he finally turned to you, he saw that you were smiling—the biggest smile in the world, and that told him that he had said the right thing.
“Thanks Hoya-oppa!” You shouted, before wrapping him in your arms in a tight hug.
“Ehh… let’s make it official by eating some cake instead.” He shrugged you off of him, “Girls have cooties…” he muttered, ruffling your hair.